I have had the best and some of the worst in many things, in many ways. I have been loved unconditionally and I have been loved very conditionally and I lost the contest. But forever thoughts get in the way. Things that your parents did or said, sibling issues, self-reflection issues.
I have lost money and I have had financial opportunities. I have been beautiful and slim and young, sensual and giving. Could I have done things differently, I would have married more carefully and with more thought into compatibility, not differences. I would have given my love to those who did not judge me by class or intelligence. Forever thoughts and the what ifs. We have all had them. Some of us can stay in the present and plan for the future. Some of us can live too much in the past and wonder where we would have been if we had chosen a different career, a different love, a different path. Those forever thoughts; they get in my way.
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